Honesty is the Best Policy-Usually

You and I know that you can get severely burned by speaking the truth. You can even say it in love but if the person you are speaking to is not ready to face truth for their life you are better to keep your words to yourself. In my experience, they will villainize you in order to not have to deal with themselves.

On the other side of the fence, their are those who are growing people and they want to hear the truth and grow, but even they come in two batches. There are those that hear the truth and immediately gracefully receive it and those who angrily reject it immediately but later calm down and deal with themselves.

So which one are you. If you fall into the first group that can't handle the truth, you definitely think you can handle the truth. So what is your indication that you are in the first "Can't handle the truth" group. You tend to say, "I can handle the truth but I don't really have that fault I was confronted with. They were wrong." You transfer blame or you set up such defensive barriers that no one in their right mind would dare tell you the truth about you.

You've got to deal with your denial and ask God to do anything he can to humble you and break you until you can finally grow again. You're stuck in relational and spiritual infancy until you do.

Discipleship requires honesty. But to disciplers Jesus said, "Don't throw your pearls before swine." I know that sounds harsh but it's what Jesus said. They will be victims in their eyes and you will be the villain. So when do you tell the truth to someone? Tune into God's Spirit and talk when he says to and be silent when he says to.

Disciples, James 4:9-10 says "Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." God will probably have to break you for you to begin growing again. You can willingly submit to his correction and breaking or resist it for a life time but now that your his child the correction will never stop until you change or die. Sounds fun!

A truthful life invites truth and dishonest heart invites flattery.

Things I love about My life

I was writing to a friend earlier and was telling him how I am doing and realized again just how blessed I am. I love my going on dates with Sheri. We danced Saturday with each other and with our kids at a wedding Saturday and I felt proud to be seen with the prettiest lady in the room. I love having four big hugs everyday when I get home. I love wrestling with my boys and cuddling and talking with my girls. I love family outings and Tuesday staff meetings. Sometimes I don't sleep well on Mondays because I am so ready to get back to work on Tuesdays. I love to preach and see God use my life to bless someone elses. I love Sunday afternoons with my extended family at Mom's house. I love dreaming and planning. I love a challenge and crave a godly risk. I love playing the piano and singing at the top of my lungs when no ones around. I love reading the bible and having something speak directly to my heart. And with all this I am just getting started. I am so blessed and thankful for the life God has given me. I think it's good to stop and remember all we have. Thank you God for your amazing goodness to me.

Setting Imaginary Deadlines

For years I struggled with managing my time effectively. One tool I learned that dramatically increased my effectiveness is the “imaginary deadline.”

If I’ve got a project without a deadline, it’s easy to procrastinate or work halfheartedly. When an assignment has a hard deadline, I start faster, work smarter and focus better.

•Instead of thinking, I need to have my sermon finished before I preach this weekend, I have a Wednesday-at-noon deadline. It’s not anyone else’s deadline. It’s mine.
•Rather than saying this video needs to be finished by next week, I complete all videos by Wednesday at 2 pm. Again, this is my deadline.
•Instead of deciding to read my Bible plan some time during the day, I have mine read before I leave my house.
These are all imaginary deadlines. But when I treat them as real, my productivity and efficiency increase.

(This leadership lesson is from Craig Groeschel pastor of LifeChurch.tv)

Date Night!

I love date night. It's Friday and I am heading out with my amazing wife. Since we got married 13 1/2 years ago we have been going on dates. Through the birth of all three children and the adoption of Gabriel. It's so therapeutic for me. We just talk and unwind and realize that long after the church is pastored by someone else and the kids have grown and gone it will still be the two of us in this together.

Take the time to take care of your marriage and it will pay off over and over again. So what are we going to do tonight? Whatever we want!!!

Something Great is on the Horizon!

IF the Bible is true, IF Jesus died on the cross to reconcile people to Himself (II Corinthians 5:15-21), IF He desires people to come to a knowledge of the truth (I Timothy 2:3-7), IF He has commanded us to reach the world (Acts 1:8), IF He has risen from the dead (I Corinthians 15:3-4), IF He has given us the Holy Spirit (Acts 2) and IF He has empowered us to do His work (II Timothy 1:7) then to expect NOTHING to happen is simply inconsistant with Scripture, His commands and His character! There is a building sense of expectation of NOT just a revival in our land…but a brand new awakening.

I honestly believe the greatest days of the church are yet to be experienced!!!

The best really is yet to come!

5 WAYS TO REBUKE A FRIEND

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. Proverbs 17:17

Wounds from a friend can be trusted… Proverbs 27:6

Rebuke: Express sharp disapproval or criticism of (someone) because of their behavior or actions.

Years ago in college, I had a friend tell me was very painful to the people I was closest to and challenged me to think about why I was using sarcasm. I initially dismissed him as being overly sensitive but later assessed what he said and realized what a jerk I was being to people and decided I would not longer be sarcastic. That has stuck with me for over 20 years and probably has probably kept me from hurting countless people needlessly.

That’s only one example. Thankfully there have been many other times a friend loved me enough to help me see the mistakes I was making. Usually I knew, but the rebuke challenged me to alter my ways. I’ve had to “return the favor” many times.
There are times when you have to rebuke a friend, in order to be a true friend. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is to tell another where he or she is doing wrong. You may be the only one who cares enough to point out what everyone else sees, but refuses to address.

If you choose to accept the assignment of rebuking a friend, you should be sure you are correct in your assessment, you should pray through the correct timing of your approach, and you should address the person and not others to keep from spreading gossip.

When that time comes, here are 5 ways to rebuke a friend:

1. Be loving - As we should do with everything, rebuke should come in the context of a loving relationship. In fact, one standard might be to not rebuke people you don’t love.

2. Be truthful – Don’t dance around or use subtleties when addressing the issue. State the problem as you see it.

3. Be helpful – Be willing to walk through any necessary recovery with the friend or help them process where they are in life.

4. Be purposeful - The rebuke should not be vindictive in nature or driven by jealousy or selfish interests. The betterment of the friend should be your sole objective.

5. Be redemptive – Be willing to extend grace and forgive the friend for any wrong done. Make sure he or she knows you are still in their corner.

Facebook Does Not Cause Affairs… People Do!

Below are 7 methods to help married couples create positive barriers into their online presence:

1. Universal passwords for e-mail and social media account log-ins
2. Joint online accounts with joint photos
3. Encourage utilization and sharing of one another’s account
4. No Ex Policy (Ex boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, acquaintances…
can’t be on your friends list)
5. Ask the question, “Would my spouse be okay with this message, email or post?”
6. Openness and honesty (Know your struggles)
7. Delete your account

There are many different ways to minimize the risk and not allow a hint of inappropriate behavior to step into your marriage.